I was recently browsing the Apple Music Hot Song list — a perpetually losing effort to remain cool and connected — and realized, for the very first time, I didn't know what any of them were. Not a one. Not even a vague recollection of something I heard someone talking about. Nothing. Further, some of them were extremely profane with very not subtle references to anatomy and related biological phenomena and geographical locations and things grown people do together.
(If a song immediately comes to mind, that's the one I am referencing. If you're wondering if it's the other one, yes, it's that one, too. If you are my mother, don't try to figure any of this out. Please.)
There's a younger version of myself that's more appalled by my Puritanical descriptions of the songs rather the content of the songs themselves. The current version of myself has reconciled a fierce opposition to censorship with the belief that we don't have to like everything we see or hear. At least I think I have.
Is this just what happens? Do we mellow and soften? Are our edges more rounded? Is this how we "old?" (Full disclosure: I've never been old before, so this is new.)
I am but a month from a milestone birthday — arguably the milestone birthday — and the closer I get, the more I find myself thinking about the significance of it, of getting older, and how you know when you're "old."
My first tussle with this turning of the corner occurred a year ago when I took a crack at SnapChat. After fumbling through the not-so-intuitive interface trying to figure out how to "do a snap," I deleted the app and announced to my wife that I just didn't "get it." (She didn't understand why I downloaded it in the first place.)
Being mad about not getting things is child's play. Being ambivalent about not "getting" things is old person stuff.
More recently, I've begun to entertain the notion that "age is just a number." This is textbook rationalization of the old or nearly old. People would say this when I was younger, and I would graciously smile and nod all the while thinking, "That's exactly what an old person would say, Old Person. I am sorry for your old and sad situation."
It didn't show up the way I thought it would. I figured it would announce itself. As a kid, you assume there's some magical plateau you reach or club you enter where they issue an adult card and you suddenly know everything you need to know, and life is figured out.
Instead, it has just kind of happened, slowly, then all of a sudden. It's like swimming in the ocean. You've got your head down (perhaps not in Galveston), enjoying a warm soak amongst the flesh-eating bacteria, wondering what just touched your leg (okay, in Galveston), then you look back to shore and you're 100 yards away from where you started. You didn't even notice it. (Also, you probably need penicillin.)
Now you're older, but you still don't know everything. Or anything. In fact, you've never been more aware of how much you don't know. You're indeed closer to old than young, but you don't feel like you're old enough to be as old as you actually are.
Until you've downloaded TikTok, of course. Then you'll know exactly where you stand.
P.S. Megan Thee Stallion had the better bars.
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ONCE UPON A time, social media was simply an exciting medium that connected one person to another — even on opposite ends of the globe. It was an innovative tool that helped bridge conversations and thus relationships, connecting people and allowing friendship circles to grow exponentially in no time at all. Fast forward to now, and it's mind-boggling what the term encompasses.
In a sense, "social media" has been around for ages, if you consider the invention of the telegraph, the telephone and, then, primitive versions of emails and chatrooms in the late 20th century. But what I'm really talking about when I refer to social media, is the tremendous number of social networking sites that rules our world today. And although most people can't imagine life without them, it's tough to deny that they are also upending our lives in a fanatical way.
I remember those days when my biggest beef with social media was that it disrupted my family time. Arguments ensue because kids have their faces in the social media vortex while I was starving for their attention. And although those dinner table debates still take place about the overuse of social media, the world has drastically transposed as a result of the leading platforms.
The latest sign is the unexpected insanity that has recently gone down with GameStop. For those of you that live in a cave and haven't heard, Wall Street investors have lost billions of dollars and were taken to the cleaners by social media "couch potato" or amateur retail investors, as they have been referred to. Reddit, the open-forum website, has taken on our country's financial industry. And although I'm not arguing for or against this site — truth be told, my own daughter quadrupled her own investment because of it — I'm just acknowledging the changes that are taking place in our world because of it. It's astounding.
We already have witnessed, on another level, how Twitter has changed the world of news and politics. Former President Trump was certainly not the first to rely on it for political statements, but he used it to attain new heights of communication with his followers throughout his term. And look at how Instagram has changed the world of beauty and fashion, or how YouTube or TikTok has changed the world of entertainment, making mega-stars out of 14-year-olds who have a cool new dance move they were practicing in their bedroom between homework assignments.
Social media has absolutely changed the world. It helps us find partners, jobs, news, politics and a voice. Think about how many social media sites there are that rule our society with an astronomical number of users. I haven't even mentioned Facebook, which has 2.8 billion users worldwide, according to a digital trend report by Statista. That's something like 1 out of 3 people in the world! And in rich countries, we know that almost all young people use social media in some form or another.
It's astonishing how quickly social behaviors can change. Something that is part of one third of the world's population was unfathomable just one generation ago — when I was young(er). Is it exciting? Or is it frightening? Or is it both?
Social media opens doors to information and connects us to people and opportunities. Like with everything in life, balance is key. Relying completely on anything can be unhealthy for our wellbeing. But using it to enhance our life can allow us to flourish.
Social media is not going away. In fact new platforms are popping up regularly as time passes. And as much as it drove me crazy raising young kids, I've come to terms with the positive power it has on the current generation and those to come. I believe that the positive impacts far outweigh the negatives on society. And although it would take weeks to compile research on such a statement, I'm just acknowledging that it might be time for critics of my generation to round the corner, push for balance in the social media world, and accept it for all its positive effects.
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